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The Beginning Of The End
Tim thinks getting reading glasses is the beginning of the end of his life...what is the real beginning of the end?
  
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More Irritating LA Women
Tim and Brian continue to discuss who's more irritating...Chicks from LA or Chicks from anywhere else who moved to LA
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Irritating LA Women
Tim and Brian wonder if chicks who were born in LA are more irritating than transplant chicks
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Got A Decent Joke?
Here's an Example Of A Prize Winning Joke - What are the 2 sexiest animals? A Brown Chicken And A Brown Cow...You Know Why? Because when you put them together they go "BROWN CHICKEN BROWN COW!"
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Politically Incorrect Bosses
Tim and Brian wonder if it's better for you to have a boss that openly curses and offends people, like Tribune's Sam Zell...
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Bob Miller
Tim and Brian are Live at the Staples Center with sportscasting legend, Bob Miller!
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Luc Robitalle
Tim And Brian talk to a Major LA Kings stud, Luc Robitalle
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Caffeine Addiction
Tim and Brian Are Live At The Staples Center And Tim wonders why the topic of people's addiction to Caffeine hadn't been addressed at all...
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Hittin That Gym
Tim Wonders who out of Brian, Gerry, Randy, Gina And Himself hasn't hit the gym in the longest...
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Nude Radio
Tim and Brian want to know who in radio you'd like to see nude...besides Bonaduce...
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Daddy Left Too Soon?
Tim and Brian reveal a study that shows kids who had their dads take off mature faster, and not in the good way...How did your dad leaving eff you up?
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Dancing With The Aceman?
Tim and Brian try to figure out why our very own Adam Carolla is going to be on Dancing With The Stars...
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Effin Lotto Money
Tim and Brian want to know the crazy ess you would do if you won the Mega Lotto jackpot..
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Linda Salvin
Tim And Brian Talk To Linda Salvin, The World's Greatest Psychic...according to Linda Salvin
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It's Over For Hildog
Tim and the audience try to get Brian Whitman to accept that it's over for Hildog
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405 Exotics
Tim and Brian talk to the guys from 405 Exotics, a company that rents out expensive cars...
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Dave Smith
Since Whitman's still out, Tim has Josh Rubenstien and Sports Guy Dave Smith sitting in...
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Voting For The Black Guy
Guess What? Whitman's Out...Who'd of Guessed It? Anyway, Is Tim a racist for wanting to vote for Barack Obama just because it'd be cool to have a black president? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Dr. Sophy, Man!
Tim and Brian talk to psychiatrist Dr. Sophy about Brian's mess of a life and Tim's parenting habits...
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Jay Kogen And Billy Ray
Tim and Brian talk to writing studs Jay Kogen and Billy Ray about the ending writers strike
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Ex Wives, Man!
Tim and Brian discuss Paul McCartney and Heather Mills' major divorce battle...How has that ex wife made your life a living hell?
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Robin Anton
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with the Pussycat Dolls' Robin Anton
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Herbie Hancock
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Herbie Hancock
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Dr. Drew Pinsky
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Loveline And Celebrity Rehab's Dr. Effin Drew!
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Lou Gossett Jr.
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Lou Gossett Jr.
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Tia Carrere
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Tia Carrere
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Kim Kardashian
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Kim Kardashian
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Chyna
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Celebrity Rehab's Chyna
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Nikki Sixx
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Motley Crue's Nikki Sixx
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Tantric
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with the band, Tantric
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Patrick Warburton
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Family Guy , Seinfeld, and Rules of Engagement's Patrick Warburton
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The Used
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with the band The Used
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Kat Von D
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with LA Ink's Kat Von D
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Mark Wahlberg And Eliot Yamin
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with The Moment Of Truth's Mark Wahlberg and American Idol's Eliot Yamin
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Mitchell Musso
Tim And Brian are backstage at the Grammys with Hannah Montana's Mitchell Musso
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Totallier Open Phones!
Tim takes one end, Brian takes the other, and together they Totally Open Those Phones!!!
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Conway And Essman
Emergency!!!! Emergency!!! Clear Wilshire Blvd! Brian Whitman has to leave the station...to take a royal ess...
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Robin's News And Bad Effin Jokes
Robin does the news, and Tim and Brian try to get the best joke out of the audience, which proves to be a major challenge with all the lame ess out there
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Superbowl Plans
Call in and piss Tim off with your Superbowl plans that are probably much better than Tim's party full of wives and kids...
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A Very Gay Topic
Tim and Brian debate on whether most gays"go all the way", and also wonder if Gay couples fight less...
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A Very Depressing Topic
The King Of The Damaged, Brian Whitman, talks about sometimes wanting to end it all...Is he really serious?
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A Pot Topic
Tim and Brian want to know the best way to transport and send yourself some weed
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That House Or That Wife?
If you buy a million dollar house, and your wife suddenly decides she doesn't want to live there after an effing week, what do you ditch? that wife or that house?
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Totallier Open Phones!
The Phones are even more open!! Brian took one end, and Tim took the other end...and voila! Totally Open Phones!!
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Mirriam Or Estelle?
Tim and Brian want to know which old yenta you would rather take to Hawaii...and then one of these yentas is calling in
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Manage A Death
After Brad Renfro and Heath Ledger's Death, Tim and Brian want to know who's next on the dead celebrity list? They Always come in 3's you know...
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Roger Lodge And Howard Brubaker
Tim and Brian talk to major stud, Roger Lodge from "Blind Date", and Howard Brubaker, a nutjob who thinks love doesn't exist
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Chris Antzoulatos Man!
Tim and Brian bring in our Number One Studly Sales Guy, Chris Antzoulatos to talk sales
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Tim's Neighbor
How does Tim approach his neighbor who walks around with his junk hanging out? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Marrying Twins
What are the advantages and disadvantages of marrying your twin? 5-2-0 97-1-0!!
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Stump The Monkey!!!
Its another Whitless Monday...but don't worry, Malibu Dan is in for a round of Stump The Monkey!!! And If you think he's gotten smarter in the last 2 years...you'd be wrong
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Robin's News And Sam Simon
Robin brings the Whitless news on this Whitless Monday, and Sam Simon comes in to tell some Vegas stories...
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Emotional Chicks
Tim and Brian will both marry the firs chick that calls in that truly isn't emotional, and doesn't cry
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Effin Moms, Man
Tim and Brian want to know what's the meanest thing your mom did you you as a kid
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Robin's News And Eating With FHF
Robin brings the news and Tim and Brian play audio of Frosty, Heidi and Frank describing what Tim and Brian would taste like if they were eaten
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Chick Jeopardy
Tim and Brian try to find the smartest chick in the audience by asking chick callers general knowledge questions
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Peoples Choice Awards
Brian quizzes Tim to see if he knows who anyone who won a Peoples Choice Award last night is...
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The Brothel Debate
If a guy goes to a brothel to cheat on his wife, and he finds out his wife is working there as a prostitute, who should be more pissed?
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Sex With Emily
Tim And Brian talk sex with Sex With Emily's Emily...thats the most redundant description ever...
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Malibu Dan And Nate - Part 2
Tim and Malibu Dan continue to talk to the most disturbing individual in the world, Dan's Best-Best friend Nate
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Malibu Dan And Nate - Part 1
Tim brings in Malibu Dan, and Dan's Best-Best friend Nate calls in again...yeah, the guy who lives in his mom's basement
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More Bad Jokes
Tim tries to get the best joke of the night from you guys, but it's a 3D room of flat ess...
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Classic CNW - Leykis, Gas Prices, And Rick Dees
Here's Part 4 of a sampling of what the early days of Conway and Whitman were like...Tim gets advice from Weekday and Weekend Leykis, Tim and Brian fight over gas prices, and Rick Dees has a new PSA
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Classic CNW - 2 Truths And A Lie
Here's Part 4 of a sampling of what the early days of Conway and Whitman were like...Tim And Brian play a round 2 Truths And A Lie!
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Classic CNW - Stump The Monkey
Here's Part 3 of a sampling of what the early days of Conway and Whitman were like...Tim And Brian play a round of Stump The Monkey with Malibu Dan!
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Classic CNW - Dr. Drew Part 2
Here's Part 2 of a sampling of what the early days of Conway and Whitman were like...Dr. Drew continues to deal with the 2 biggest head-cases in radio
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Classic CNW - Dr. Drew Part 1
Here's Part 1 of a sampling of what the early days of Conway and Whitman were like...Back in the Summer of 2005, the boys had Dr. Drew Pinsky from Loveline on, and hilarity ensues!
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You Shouldn't Have Said That Brian
Sam Phillips gets wildly pissed at Brian for his comparison of her looks now and then, so Brian brings in Gerry, Randy, And Gina to settle the score
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Is Sam Hotter Now?
Brian and Sam Phillips debate on how hot She is compared to when she was in Penthouse...
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More On Rambo
Brian and Sam continue to fight on the Rambo issue, and we play Tom Leykis' audition for the original Rambo...
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Gina And Sam's Debacle
Sam Phillips offered Gina Grad an offer in her new softcore porn movie...and Gina's completely outraged.
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Robin's News and Rambo
Robin brings the news and Brian and Sam debate on whether it's worth your 10 bucks to see a 60 year old Rambo on the big screen
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More Beard Talk
Would you date someone with a beard? (snap) Could you date someone with a beard? (snap) should you date someone with a beard? (snap) 5-2-0 97-1-0!!!
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Probably Not
Well At least I don't think Brian and Sam have had sexies...what do you think?
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Have Brian And Sam Banged?
Go to conwayandwhitman.com now and vote on whether you think Brian and Sam Phillips have banged in the past...
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Young Chicks And Jamie Gold
Brian and Sam debate on whether you can talk about hot young chicks when you have a kid, and then Poker guy Jamie Gold calls in.
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Robin's News!
Robin's back in 08 to bring you the news, and everybody's favorite superhero is back!
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Brian's Back For More Insults
Tim's still on vacation, so Brian and Sammy Phillips are in, and we're starting the new year off with a major insult to Brian Whitman from Adam Carolla!
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Dennis Gilbert
Tim and Larry King talk to Baseball Agent Dennis Gilbert about his baseball charity
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Another Pregnant Spears?
Tim and Brian believe that Jamie Lynn Spears getting pregnant at 16 is completely White trash, what say you?
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Effin Christmas Cards
Tim and Brian wonder what the eff makes people think we care about how your entire year went in a christmas card...
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Totally Open Phones!!!
Brian made it all week without calling in sick! Now's the time to call in and congratulate him for it!
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Gerry Effs Up....Again
Tim and Brian bring in Gerry Wachovsky once again to report on his incompetence at being Executive Producer of the show
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Gerry's An Idiot
Tim reprimands Gerry Wachovsky again...on his first day back this idiot effs up!
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Gettin Out Of A Ticket
Tim and Brian want to hear your best excuse to get out of a traffic ticket when you get pulled over.
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Gerry In Vegas
Tim, Brian, Gina and Randy all received pleas for money for a broke Gerry Wachovsky in vegas, and they all fell for his money grubbing...
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Robin's News And David Mosican
Robin does the news and Tim and Brian talk to David Mosican from the Commerce Casino about the poker tournament on Thursday
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Porn Star Sunny Lane
Tim and Brian talk to porn star, Sunny Lane...and yes, Brian does try to pick up on her...
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Gina's Christmas Carols
Gina Grad unveils some Christmas Carols she wrote for the Conway And Whitman Staff...and they're quite insulting!
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Name That Effin 80's Movie Soundtrack!
Brian's out again...I know, it's hard to believe, but Arsenio Hall is in, and he's ready to play a round of "Name That Effin 80's Movie Sountrack" with our own Gina Grad!
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Got A Decent Joke?
Then call Timmy now and lay it on him and you could win a decent prize!
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Gerry's Stalker
Tim and Brian talk to Gerry Wachovsky's biggest fan...and he's a little crazy...
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Lets Play The Feud!!!!!
It's time once again to play the Family Feud! Louie Anderson hosts a heated battle between the Conway family (Tim and Gerry), and the Grad family (Gina and Randy)...LETS PLAY THE FEUD!!!
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Singles Ad And Randy's Sex Tip
Tim and Brian play atrocious singles ad from youtube, and then Randy Wang tries to sell his newest feature on the station "Randy Wang's Sex Tip Of The Day"
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Sounds Good To Me
Tim replys to a mass corporate email from Les Moonves to all CBS employees just to say "Sounds Good To Me..."
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Winterfest 07
Tim and Brian talk to bands and strippers that will be performing at the Winterfest 07 show at club Tatou on Sunday
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Dr. Sophy
Tim and Brian talk to child psychologist, Dr. Sophy about any damaging effects that little Sophia might have as a result of Tim taking her to the track
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Jacob Emrani
Tim and Brian take your legal questions with the only lawyer Tim reccomends, Jacob Emrani
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Do You Likea Porno?
Tim and Brian wonder if you consider your kids watching porn a big problem or not
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Leykis On Carolla
Tim And Brian playback the fight between Tom Leykis and Teresa Strasser that happened this morning on the Adam Carolla show
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Malibu Dan's Pet Pee
Tim and Brian bring in Malibu Dan and he has some Pet Pee's to discuss...seriously...
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Breaking Robin's News
Robin reads an urgent statement about the community refrigerator in the kitchen, and then brings the news!
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Brian Owes Randy $500
The pariah of the station, Brian Whitman, gets accused of owing Randy Wang $500 for losing the last Name That Tune, and Randy's got proof...
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The Very Best Of Robin's News
Tim, Brian and Robin look back at all the best news clips from the last few months...Can I get some snow?..I Think She Od'd!
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Trick Or Treat!!!
Here's Even More Best Of Stuff...all the Trick or Treat bits set to the beat of "Dead Man's Party"
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Tom, Tom, And Imus
Heres some best of stuff for you studs to enjoy - Leykis 101 Tom and Tasting Room Tom clash, and then Tom meets Imus!
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Totally Open Phones Duuuuuuude!
Alright Gang, Friday Night! Anything you wanna say? 5-2-0 97-1-0 Man! And if you have a Triple...Eight...Jones...8-8-8 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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W-2...The Show That Just Sucks...
Randy Wang And Gerry Wachovsky auditioned for the 7PM slot at KFI...and it could be the worst radio show in the history of radio itself...
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Leo, Coach Dave, And Demos
Tim and Brian talk to Leo the Film Freak at the food drive, Coach Dave calls in with his picks, and Ricardo Dees comes in to review some demos
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Sellin That Vote
Alright gang, would you sell your vote in the 2008 election for a 12 pack? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Tim And Gerry's Off Air Brawl
Brian and Randy secretly recorded Tim and Gerry really getting into it over Gerry's lateness...and we're gonna play it on the air!
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Lets Play The Feud!!!!!
Louie Anderson is here to host another edition of Family Feud! Returning champion, Tim Conway Jr. is going against challenger, Gerry Wachovsky....LETS PLAY THE FEUD!!!
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Jesse Jackson And The Real Rick Dees!
Tim and Brian finally get to "What The Hell did Jesse Jackson Say?", but then the real Rick Dees calls in to congratulate us on our Number 1 status!
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We're Number 1!!!!...On Laradio.com...
The station threw us a suprise party for being the most listened to show by readers of Laradio.com, and special guests Adam Carolla, Frosty Heidi and Frank, Arnold Schwarzenegger and others have come out to congratulate us!
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Banging Teachers
Tim and Brian wonder if banging your teacher at a young age really messes you up, or if you're just making excuses...
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Gina Takes The Tummy Test
Gina, with a bag on her head, has to feel the bellies of Tim Conway Jr, Brian Whitman, Gerry Wachovsky, and Randy Wang, and tell who's who.
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Name That Effin Tune - A To Z
Gerry Wachovsky And Gina Grad go head to head in the last "Name That Effin Tune" of this week's marathon, and this round, the each song starts with the next letter in the alphabet
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Robin's News
Robin does the news including the Neverland Ranch housing discrimination PSA
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Robin's News And A Challenge
Robin does the news including Tonight Show auditions, and Brian issues a challenge to Randy Wang for a Name That Tune Rematch...
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Who Gives An Eff, Ellen!
Tim and Brian wonder if anyone cares if Mr. Generes...I Mean Miss Degeneres crosses the picket line
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John And Jif's Rap Album
Tim and Brian premire the new LP from the overnight crew at 97.1 - John and Jif Rappin The 3rd Shift!!
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Gerry Belongs To The City
Tim and Brian check in with Gerry Wachovsky, still at the 7-11 in Long Beach, and still raising money to pay back Tim for the $100 he stole to feed the monkey on his back.
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Lets Play The Feud!!!!
You Wanna Play The Feud? Its the Grad family, represented by Gina, VS the Conway family, represented by Tinny! And Louie Anderson is here from vegas to....PLAY THE FEUD!!!!
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Robin's News And Panhandling Gerry
Robin does the news and Tim and Brian check in with Gerry, who is panhandling in front of a Long Beach 7-11 to make back the money he stole from Tim
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Live At KCAL9 With Jim Hill
Tim and Brian are broadcasting live from the KCAL9/CBS2 newsroom once again, and this hour they are joined by CBS2's sports guy, Jim Hill!
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Live At KCAL9 With David Goldstien
Tim and Brian are broadcasting live from the KCAL9/CBS2 newsroom once again, and this segment they are joined by CBS2 investigative reporter, David Goldstien
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Live At KCAL9 With Adam Carolla!
Tim and Brian are broadcasting live from the KCAL9/CBS2 newsroom once again, and this hour they are joined by the Ace-Man himself...Adam Carolla!
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Come On Everybody, Eric Dubin! Eric Dubin!
Eric Dubin! You may not like what he says, Eric Dubin! But he'll say it anyway, Eric Dubin! He's the baddest cat around, Eric Dubin! He's got the sharpest tounge in town!
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Name That Effin Tune - Brian VS Gina!
Its time for another round of "Name That Effin Tune Man" And this time Brian and Gina are going head to head on songs with names in them....and you know Brian is gonna bitch...
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Malibu Dan And Nate
Tim brings in Malibu Dan and his best best friend, Nate, who lives in his moms basement calls in...
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Cop Charity
Tim talks to Tom And Jerri from a police charity promoting a charity event....
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Brian's Death Threat?
Go to conwayandwhitman.com to see the picture that has Brian considering litigation, dear
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Dress Like A Whore Day
Brian and Sammy Phillips discuss the mentality of chicks that dress like slutty trampy hos on Halloween
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Brian's Halloween Trivia
Timmys got some major indigestion, so Sammy Phillips is in and Brian wants you to stump him on the movie "Halloween"
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Name That Effin Tune - Brian VS Randy!
Its the clash of the a-holes when Randy Wang and Brian Whitman go head to head on 80's songs to see who is the true champion of Name That Effin Tune Man!
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Whores For Halloween
If you dress like a slut for Halloween, is that a signal that your marriage is over? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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The King Of The Damaged
Brian thinks Gina was hitting on him during the break, and another Tim and Brian verbal brawl follows suit.
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Jim Hill On Kobe
Tim and Brian talk to CBS2's Jim Hill about Kobe Bryant's bolting from the Lakers and leaving LA with no chance of a successful team in any sport.
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The Saddest Songs...Ever
Brian Whitman is back with an energetic fun topic for Friday night....the saddest songs ever written
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Robbin Chicks
Tim and Arsenio wonder if any chicks have jacked you like Shaq's wife jacked him financially
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Ewww...Germs!
Tim and Arsenio go down the list of the dirtiest places and things on the earth...If Whitman was here, he'd have an OCD attack!
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Sex With Emily
Tim and Sammy Phillips talk to fellow hot radio chick, Emily Morris about....sex
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Brian's Gone.......Again
But he is here more than he's not...right? Why is he out? I wonder why...dear. Sammy Phillips is in with all her psycho theories on who started the fires.
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How Bout Some Comformity?
Tim and Brian want some effing consistently with ATM machines, gas stations, toilets....why can't everything just be the same?
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Scott Sh..Who Gives An Eff Brian?
Brian gets pissed when Randy plays snoring drops over his Scott Shannon story, so Tim asks the callers if they really wanna hear this story anyway.
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Jacob Emrani
Tim and Brian bring in lawyer Jacob Emrani to discuss legal matters that you may encounter in this fire disaster
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Robin's News
That's right, other things happened today besides the fires, and Robin is here to bring you the most important non-fire stories of the day
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Fire Talk With Dr. Lamm And Josh Rubenstien
You can't avoid it...SoCal is on fire, and this segment Tim and Brian get some smoke health warnings from Dr. Steven Lamm and then get the weather report from CBS2's Josh Rubenstien
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Robin's News And Gerry's Breakdown
Robin finally gets to the news, and it has nothing to do with the fires, and then Tim and Brian try to figure out how to get Gerry Mistakesky to not be such a lazy producer
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The Best Of Robin's News
Robin recaps the week in news with stories including Jay Leno, Michael Jackson, And....John Boyle?
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Oh Ellen...Oh Babu
Tim and Brian get into another heated discussion over Ellen and Iggy The Dog
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Robin's News And Finding Vu
Robin does the news, and Tim and Brian talk to Tarin Vu, a former KLSX sales girl from Vietnam who is on a mission to find her long lost sister
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Ellen Drama
Tim and Brian get into it over the Ellen dog debate
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Robin's News
Robin brings the news with exclusive audio from Diddy, a woman who cusses out her toilet, and...John Boyle?
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Name That Effin Tune - Brian VS Gerry!
Its time for another edition of "Name That Effin Tune Man!" This time, self-proclaimed master of the game, Brian Whitman ,goes against Mr. Sausage Fingers, Gerry Wachovsky, on 80's music
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Banging Robots
Tim wonders if Brian would bang a robot when the technology becomes available
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Coke Or Pepsi
Tim and Brian want to know why restaurants cant just sell both brands of soda
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Robin's News And Graham Wellington
Robin does the news and Tim and Brian wonder if housing discrimination, as depicted in the greatest PSA of all time, is still an issue today. Yes Hello, My Name Is Graham Wellington!
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Break Up Excuses
Brian reveals the line that most chicks use to dump him, and Tim wants the lines you got
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Yo! Gerry Raps!
Tim has discovered a tape of Gerry's rap demo, doing covers of Dr. Dre...you know what?...just listen...you'll be amazed...
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Relationship Health With Sammy Phillips
You guessed it, Brian's out...again...but Sammy Phillips is here and she and Tim believe that bad relationships are bad for that ticker? What do you think?
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Malibu Monday!
Tim brings in Malibu Dan to convince Brian to get on some kind of drug regiment for his effing depression.
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Think Tank Recap
Tim and Brian reflect on all the hot air Tom Leykis and Jack Silver were blowing at Friday's Think Tank.
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Robin's News
Robin Brings the news with a brand spanking new intro!
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Brian's Gone Off The Deep End
Brian Whitman is 35 and is already writing his effing will! He believes his life is already over, and this depression of his is really starting to freak everyone out.
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Gettin Into That Stock Market
Tim has almost finally accepted the fact that he can't win the pick six, so he wants to try his hand at the stock market...any advice?
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Malibu Music Monday!
Malibu Dan comes by to hang out, and Tim and Brian have more songs that Dan has to try and pay attention to the meaning to.
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Oh Britney, You Effed Up!
Tim and Brian talk about Britney Spears losing her kids, and an alleged ex-nanny calls in to dish the Britney dirt!
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Totally Open Phones Man!
Tim's gonna take one end, and Brian's gonna take another end, and together they're going to pull those phones wide open!
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Robin's News And Gina's Farts
Robin Does the best of the news for the week, and Tim and Brian get to the bottom of Gina's alleged farts from the other day
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The Staff Meeting
Tim and Brian recount the staff meeting earlier today where Brian wouldn't shut up!
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A-Hole Parents Live At Commerce Casino
Tim can't believe that the parents of a friend of little Sophia's want to have all the guests at their son's birthday not give gifts, but dontate to breast cancer
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A Hero's Reward
Tim and Brian wonder what good deed you have done that got you nothing but ess in return
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Robin's News
Robin brings the craziest news you'll hear on the radio including Croatian biker's penis struck by lightning, and drunk woman infiltrates Loverboy concert
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Mothereffing Dodgers!
Tim and Brian can't believe it's been nearly 20 years since the Dodgers were in the world series
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Effing With Those Creditors
Tim and Brian want advice for broke ass Gina on how to pull a fast one on her creditors to lower her $50,000 in debt
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The Best Of Robin's News
Robin plays the wildest news clips from this week, including John at Hooters, Angelina Jolie's Vices, And Racist Dennys
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Gotta Avoid Those Hangovers!
Tim and Brian want the for sure 100% way to not get a hangover in the morning, and If you even think of calling in to say "Don't Drink", kill yourself you reptile!
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Move Out Already Gerry!
Whats the cutoff age for living at home and mooching off your parents? Because Gerry's 25 and still at that house in Lakewood
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Randy And Gerry's Night At Scores
Tim And Brian get down on Randy Wang and Gerry Wachovsky for using Leykis 101 stickers to get into Scores, and then Randy and Gerry rip on eachother's strip club etiquette.
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Robins News, Manilow And LSD
Robin does the news, Brian defends his gay love for Barry Manilow, and Tim wants to know the stuff you've done on LSD
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Those Effing LA Juries
Tim and Brian wonder why the eff LA juries let wackos like OJ and Phil Spector off the hook
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Emmys Recap With Mr X
Tim and Sammy Phillips talk to an unnamed industry insider about last nights crapfest they call the Emmys
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Robin's News
Robin Brings the news including a very angry couple at denny's. you dont wanna miss this one N*****
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OJ, OJ, OJ
Tim and Sammy Phillips Dissect the new OJ case
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The Return Of Juan Y Ken!
Tim and Sammy Phillips dissect a brand new CD from 2 mexican radio guys who are ripping off KFI's John And Ken
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The 25 Skills Every Chick Should Know
Tim and Sammy Phillips read off a list of the 25 skills every man should know, and now Tim wants your picks for the 25 skills every chick should know. #1 - know how to work that stick, man!
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Who Didn't See This One Coming
Tim and Sammy Phillips talk to ex-screener, Shanna Woolsey who is moving away from CONNECTICUT after she was almost killed.
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Robin's News
Robin Brings the craziest news you'll hear on the radio. LEAVE BRIAN ALLONEEEE!
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Randy Wang Can't Get High!
Randy Wang claims he has never been able to get high in the 50+ times he's smoked weed. Tim believes him, but Sam thinks he is full of it, what do you think?
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Tim Vs Hildog
Brian's out so Slammin Sammy Phillips is in tonight, and Tim talks about his outrage with something Hillary Clinton said about Iraq
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Thai Talk 2 - Asian Boogaloo
John Boyle From The John and Jif Show comes on to talk about his trip to Thailand last week, and we found even more Karaoke Hits from Mr. Asian Women.
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It's Britney Bitch!
Tim and Brian wonder if the VMA performance marks the end of Britney Spears Career
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Robin's News
Robin brings in the craziest news you'll hear on the radio...I Think She Od'd!
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Malibu Monday!
Malibu Dan is in studio for a classic round of "Does The Monkey Get The Song?"
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Gerry's Morning Workout
Tim and Brian have found the song that Gerry does an aerobics dance to every morning, and its really, really, really gay.
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Robins News And Diego
Robin is back with the craziest news bytes from today, and Tim and Brian find a columbian cartoon about a cocaine dealer...can I get some snow?
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Shes Nude Dude!
While Tim and Brian drool over the nude photo of Vanessa Hudgens, they want to know the famous chicks you wanted to see nude when you were a kid
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Totally Open Phones Duuuuuuude!
I tell ya man, we're opening these phones up so wide, you cant believe it! But if you're not interesting, we're going to DROP THAT CALL!
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Best Of Robin's News And Laura
Robin Brings in the best of the news for the week, and Tim brings up a strange predicament his friend is in - he named his daughter after his ex-girlfriend!
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Demo Reviews
Tim and Brian review demos from Brian's early music DJ days, Jack Silver's morning show, and Chick Chat
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John In Thailand And SUVs
Tim and Brian check in with John Boyle on his way to Thailand, and then debate over John Edwards' plan to get rid of SUVs
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Tom Leykis At The Movies!
And Now....Tom Leykis At The Movies! name the film that Tom Leykis is acting out, and win a prize....Action!
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Big Brewmaster Timmy
Tim is thinking of buying a brewery up in Oregon, and wants advice on owning your own business
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The Dumbest Thing You've Ever Heard
Tim and Brian want to know whats the stupidest thing you've ever said or heard. But could anything be dumber than that Miss Teen USA chick?
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Rick Dees Demo Reviews
Lets Get Right Back To The Hits! Tim, Brian and Rick Dees review demos sent to KLSX. This week we have Ed Powers, Gerry's Colon Show, Dangerous Radio, and John and Jeff!...Lets hope they're not listening.
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Keeping That Buzz Goin
How do you keep that decent buzz goin without goin too far or getting caught? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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The Best Strip Clubs
Tim and Brian poll the audience to see where's the best place to get a table dance!
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Juan y Ken Por La Manana!
Tim and Brian discover a tape of a mexican radio duo who are either ripping off KFI's John and Ken or Mexico has the same border trouble as us.
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Presidential Wives
Do we give an eff about the opinons of these wives of presidential candidates? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Car Insurance
Tim and Brian count down the top 10 most expensive cars to insure
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Shock The Sausage!
Tim tries to use KFWB's heart defibrillator on Gerry "Sausage Fingers" Wachovsky. Is this even legal?
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Viva Viagra!
Tim and Brian analyze the latest retarded Viagra commercial
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Ugh....Chick Radio....Boooring!
Tim and Brian revel in the fall of Greenstone Media, the company Jane Fonda and Gloria Steinem founded that tried to make a all chick talk radio format.
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Rick Dees Demo Reviews
Lets Get Right Back Into The Hits! Tonight Tim, Brian and Rick Dees are digging in the vaults and reviewing the demos of The Nastyman, Lockdown, and Ed Tyll! Come On Everybody Ed Tyll, Ed Tyll!
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Robin's News And Home Depot
Robin brings on the news, and Tim and Brian wonder why city counsel members in sunland shut down a proposed Home Depot in the area
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The First Major Event You Remember
Since Elvis' 30th anniversary of his death is tomorrow, Tim and Brian wonder whats the first major news story you remembered as a kid......I Think He OD'd!
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Toys That Can Kill That Kid
Tim and Brian are outraged at this Mattel toy recall of toys with lethal amounts of lead in them, and the corporate reaction to solving the problem
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Lets Put Brian On Match.com
What qualities of Brian Whitman should Tim post on Brian's new match.com profile? His Mugs? His Impressions? his OCD?
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Cellphone Reception
If you buy a more expensive cellphone do you get better reception? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Robin's News And Hold The Cheese
Robin brings the news and Howard....um Tim and Brian talk about the a-holes who are suing McDonalds because they left the cheese on.
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The I-Man Makes A Comeback!
Tim and Brian talk to Don Imus who has settled his lawsuit with CBS and is also being sued by one of those Rutgers' Nappy Headed Hos.
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Effin Starbucks A-holes!
Who the eff does a table read at a Starbucks? What A Bunch Of A-holes! What's the oddest thing you've seen at Starbucks?
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I Said It Man, Totally Open Phones!
These phones are so wide open, you wouldn't believe it! anything you wanna talk about we'll put you on my brotha! And be sure to check out conwayandwhitman.com to see the new Gina Mix of the weigh in video!
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Rick Dees Demo Reviews
Lets Get Right Back To The Hits! Rick Dees is here to review talk radio demos, and Tom Leykis is joining us from the Playboy Mansion to assist! This week, we're reviewing Domagoj and Gina, Tiffany Granith, And John and Jeff....Wait, John And Jeff? Uh-oh!
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Effin Soccer
Tim and Brian wonder why soccer isn't popular in the states, and why Mexican folk love it soooo much.
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Robin? And The News
Robin? delivers the news of the day and Tim and Brian put on the commentary.
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Jack Silver Is An Ass
Jack Silver finally let his true feelings out on the "Will Danny Kill It" bit on Tim's voicemail, and we have the disturbing audio!
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Barry Bonds Did It
Tim and Brian want your reaction to Barry Bonds just breaking the highest honor record in baseball
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Remembering Hal Fishman
Tim and Brian recount the marvelous life of KTLA's Hal Fishman, and play some truly sappy music.
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Malibu Dan's Office Cliches
Tim and Brian welcome back Bolis, er um, Malibu Dan to the studio to help him figure out how to correctly pronounce office slogans and cliches
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Ninteen Year Coma
Tim and Brian find out that a coma victim has woken up after 19 years. What has he missed in the last 19 years, and what hasn't he missed?
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They're Trying To Kill Will Danny Kill It!
Danny Bonaduce's Lawyer, Adam Sacks, ratted us out to Jack Silver about our little Danny bit, so Tim decided to bring him on and ream his ass, as well as Jack Silver's! Will we get to keep playing "Will Danny Kill It? Find Out!
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Totally Open Phones My Brother!
Anything you wanna talk about? call us up! and if you wanna play "Will Danny Kill It?" you better hurry before we get in trouble
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Rick Dees Demo Reviews
Lets Get Right Back To The Hits! Tim and Rick Dees play snippits from demos sent to Jack Silver's office, and if there's one man you don't want reviewing your demo tape, its Rick Dees. Got a little Fat Tounge There!
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Gerry Wachovsky - The Pig With A Reptilian Cortex
Gerry ate Tim's food without thinking about it. What an a-hole! And its not like Gerry needs to eat either! Check out Conwayandwhitman.com and look at him shirtless as well as Tim, Brian, Randy and a bottomless Gina
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What The Hell Did Jesse Jackson Say? (8-02)
Alright Gang, if you know what the honorable reverend Jesse Jackson is saying, you'll get yourself a prize! and if you want us to hang up on yous, ask to hear the clip again!
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Woolsey's Demo Review
Tim, Brian bring in Randy Wang to talk about the Demo former screener Shanna Woolsey recorded before the left to CONETTICUT! Will this demo really get her a radio gig? Rick Dees doesn't seem to think so.
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Will Bonaduce Kill Carolla's Joke?
Tim and Brian have a new game to play until management yells at them - Will Danny Bonaduce's comment kill Adam Carolla's joke or rant? You decide and get yourself a prize!
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Tom Leykis At The Movies!
Tim and Brian have uncovered Tom Leykis' old audition tapes from when he was trying to get into acting, and if you can guess what movie he is reading from, you can get yourself a prize!
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The Half Ton Weigh In!
Tim, Brian, Gerry Wachovsky, Randy Wang, and Gina grad drop to their drawers and get on the scale to see if the show is over a half ton. Check Conwayandwhitman.com soon to see the video!
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Who's Nuttier? - Potheads Or Non-Pot Smokers?
Sammy Phillips is pinch hitting for Whitman(what a suprise) and Tim tries to find out which group of people is more crazy, the Pot Smokers or the uptight people who don't do that.
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Gina's MTV Cribs Video
Malibu Dan sits in as Gina Grad and Randy Wang talk about the new hot video of Gina's complete ess-hole apartment. If you haven't seen the video yet GO TO CONWAYANDWHITMAN.COM NOW!!!!!
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Totally Open Phones Duude!
I said it man! Anything you wanna talk about, or anything you think we shoulda talked about? 5-2-0 97-1-0! Yeeeeeeeeah Man!!!
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$10,000 On Red!
Tim wants to blow $10,000 on one big bet, whats the best shot?
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Live At KCAL9 With Jackie Johnson!
Tim and Brian are broadcasting live all night from KCAL9 and this hour, they're talking to Josh Rubenstien, Paul Magers, Jackie Johnson, and a bunch of other studs from CBS2/KCAL9
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The Midwest vs LA
Tim and Brian compare the lifestyle you live from living in Cleavland and living in that Hotbox.
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Meet Gina Grad!
Tim and Brian introduce the new screener, Gina Grad, and shes just as nuts as Woolsey
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Mother Effin LA Times!
2 people get gunned down in front of the Mann's Chinese Theater, and the LA Times doesn't report it....Oh Babu someone shut down this effing paper!!!
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Shanna Woolsey's Final Show - Hour 3
Its the final hour of Shanna Woolsey's final show, and she's off to CONNECTICUT!!! and this hour, the listeners, Gerry, Tim, and Brian say their goodbyes to Shanna.
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Shanna Woolsey's Final Show - Hour 2
Woolsey is off to CONNECTICUT!!! but this hour, Sammy Phillips has handcuffed her to her mike, and Jack Silver cals in with his goodbye....even though he forgot her name...
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Shanna Woolsey's Final Show - Hour 1
Tonight is Shanna Woolsey's final night at the station. She's off to CONNECTICUT! And for some reason, Paul Magers and Shotgun Tom Kelly stop by to say goodbye this hour.
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Dads Law
Tim and Brian talk to divorce lawyers from the Dads Law firm. If you're goin through a divorce and you don't call these dudes, you're just an a-hole!
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OCD Madness!
Tim and Fellow OCDer, Brian Whitman talk to Jeff Bell about OCD.
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Fat DogPile At The Commerce
After Tim, Brian, Gerry and Woolsey weigh themselves, Tim trys to figure out how to do a dogpile on Woolsey at the Commerce without getting in trouble
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Cuttin Off That Bad Seed
Tim and Brian wonder if you can ever just completely cut off the family members who do nothing but irritate the family.
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Sausage Fingers' Movie Trivia
Tim and Brian are really not down with the new bit Gerry has come up with....guess the movie quote with Wachovsky doin all the voices? Oh babu!
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Whitman's Down....Again
If you can guess how much Brian David Whitman lost in vegas last week, you'll get yourself a prize, and you'll feel alot better about yourself.
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That Kid Or Vegas
Whats better? Being married with that kid? Or being single and hittin Vegas when ever you want? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Shanna Woolsey Is A Nut
Listen to the deranged Shanna Woolsey talk about the Paul McCartney concert last night...She's Mental!
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What Is It About Paris?
Tim and Brian wonder what it is about Paris Hilton that makes us all interested in her life.
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Paris Is Leavin
Whats the deal with jail processing, you know how long it takes? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Road Trip To Amoeba
Tim and Brian take a road trip to see Shanna Woolsey standing in line for Paul McCartney.
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Woolsey Bombed In Studio
Randy Wang has brought Shanna Woolsey in tonight so she can get bombed on the air, why wouldn't you listen?
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Woolsey The Reptile Is Leaving
If Shanna Woolsey thinks its a good idea to move to Conneticut with her abusive boyfriend, then she is obviously not a mammal.
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Zack Zyler
Tim and Brian talk to Tim's dad's web guy, Zack Zyler to find some decent sites to visit on that internet
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Pierre's Jalepeno Burger
Tim tries to get Woolsey to eat a vending machine burger for $50,000, but Gerry dows it for a hundred bucks.
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Seriously, Is She That Effing Dumb?
Woolsey is in a terrible relationship and is still thinking about following this douche to Connecticut, where he's moving to on Wednesday. This Johnny Dumbass still has this retard wrapped around his little finger
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Taylor Wane Man!
Tim and Brian bring in super hot chick, Taylor Wane, to talk about the Babes and Aces Poker Tourney.
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Inside The J.O. Factory
Tim and Brian want to know who you think was the biggest kiss ass during the talk factory: Tom Leykis, Jack Silver, or Danny Bonaduce.
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Billy Ray
Tim's buddy, Billy Ray, the director of "Breach" drops in to talk movies
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Woolsey The Beatle Nut
Woolsey needs any info you have about the secret Paul McCartney concert, and she'll keep singing the hits until your ears bleed
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Settin People Up
Tim and Brian what to know why you refuse to set single friends up anymore.
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Larry Wachs Man
Former KLSX'er Larry Wachs from The Regular Guys, sent Tims Dad a fathers day card in some effort to get adopted. oh babu.
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Effin Sopranos Man
Tim can't believe how emotionally invested all these whackos are in an effing TV show
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Stayin With That Car Chase
I tell ya man the best combo out there is listen to Tim and Brian and watching KCAL 9 when there's a car chase on.
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Sopranos Man
Tim listens in as Brian and Sausgae Fingers discuss the Sopranos finale.
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Who Do Hate More
Tim and Brian wonder if you hate Paris Hilton or President Bush more.
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That Mother Effin USA Today
Tim and Brian wonder how the USA Today stays in business when they can't even report the Ducks winning that Stanley Cup until 2 days later
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Sellin That Vote
Tim and Brian wonder how much you would sell your vote for in the next election
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No More Impressions
After a call from management, Brian Whitman has decided to stop doing impressions on the show..oh babu..
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Go Ducks!
Tim and Brian are amazed that the Ducks have brought the Stanley Cup to California for the first time ever...and its not on the news yet.
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Virgins
Tim and Brian try to find the oldest dude that hasnt hit it yet.
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Divorce
Can Divorced couples really ever get back together? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Effin Garage Sale Nuts
What the eff is wrong with these mothereffing nut jobs that go to garage sales nowadays? Jesus effing Christ!
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The Vibe In Prison
Tim and Brian talk to callers who have been in prison to get the vibe of what that effin Paris Hilton will be going through
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Those Ducks Man
Tim and Brian wonder why the Ducks aren't getting as much media coverage as they should
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What Is Up With Whitman?
Whitman not only comes to work in a shirt with an essload of holes in it, but he's also in a good mood....Why?
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Totally Open Effing Phones!
You can call in and talk about anything my brotha! But if you curse on the air, Tim and Brian will punish you with dueling banjos.
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Gerry The Sound Effects Machine
That Mother Effing sausage fingers Wachovsky deleted all of our effing sound effects from Audio Vault and now Tim and Brian are making him do the sound effects with his own effing voice.
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Jury Duty
Tim and Brian talk to the creators of the new court show "Jury Duty"
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Kids Vs Ferraris With Arsenio Hall
Whitman's out, but the great Arsenio Hall is in with Tim and this hour they're trying to find the bigger chick magnent...your kid or your car
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Track Guys
Tim brings in some real big effin track studs to talk horses
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Smoking Harassment
The only radio show in America that stands up for smokers rights is giving you a sounding board against all the effin people who give you ess about smoking
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Fighting With That Wife
How Often do you fight with that wife? Is it more often than Tim and Brian fighting on the air?
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Tim's Bad Weekend
Tim has to spend the weekend with the in-laws..do you have a worse weekend going than that?
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Paul Magers Man!
CBS2 Anchor, Paul Magers calls in to talk to Tim and Brian about some breaking news.
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Name That Effing Tune!!!
Brian goes against the listeners who are trying to name the songs with numbers in the effing title.
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The View Stole Our Act
Tim and Brian are the originators of the type of banter that The View is now trying getting recognition for and chastise the show for their faulty rendition.
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Live At CBS2-KCAL 9 With Tom Leykis
Tim and Brian are broadcasting live from CBS2/KCAL9's new digs in the valley, and this hour, the real Tom Leykis stops in to talk wine, radio and the good life.
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Live At CBS2-KCAL 9 With Tim Conway
Tim and Brian are broadcasting live from CBS2/KCAL9's new digs in the valley, and this hour, Tim somehow booked a very special guest, Mr. Tim Conway!
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Whitman's Disgusting Habit
Who the eff besides Whitman goes up to co-workers and asks them if there are any boogers hanging from his nose? Oh Babu!!
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A Real Loser Move
Tm made his wife and kid sleep in the back of that SUV all night...What's a real loser move you've made? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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The Iron Maidens
Tim and Brian have the all-girl Iron Maiden tribute band in studio
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Are Hybrid Cars Safe?
Yeah, they're good for the environment, but are Hybrids safe enough for Tim to put that kid in the car without worry?
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Simon Cowell Dude!
American Idol's Simon Cowell calls in to judge the singing talents of Tim Conway Jr, Shanna Woolsey and Gerry Wachovsky
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Paul Magers And Mercury
Tim and Brian talk to CBS2 Anchor, Paul Magers about a new study on dangerous light bulbs with mercury in em
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97.1 Brian FM
Forget Jack FM, listen to the greatest hits from Whitman's iPod right here on Brian FM!
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Leavin For The Stick
Tim and Brian wonder if the wife takes it easier or harder when the husband leaves for the stick.
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The Biggest Degenerate In Radio
Tim is betting on Mexican horse races during the breaks, and now he needs Spanish translators to help him find out if he won.
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Bonaduce And The Jack Man
Tim and Brian try to get Danny Bonaduce on the line to talk about the fire, but he is being evacuated at the time, Brian makes an off color comment, and Jack Silver calls in to perform an ear rape on Brian Whitman.
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Paul Magers And That Fire
CBS2 News Anchor Paul Magers comes on to talk to Tim and Brian about the crazy fire in Griffith Park today
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Sharon Effing Tay Man!
CBS2 News hottie Sharon Tay drops in with the boys, now a bit calmer from the screaming match in the 8:00 hour.
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It All Started With Headphones
Tim and Brian get into the biggest on-air fight of all time... all because Brian didn't bring any headphones for the show.
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The Effing Homeless, Man
Conway and Whitman give their perspectives on the homeless situation in their respective parts of the world.
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Take'em to the Cleaners
A Washington DC judge is suing a dry cleaners for $67 million, plus driving expenses for losing a pair of pants he was supposed to wear on his first day on the bench.
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Workin In That Home Man
Tim and Brian wonder why a new survey thinks that stay at home mothers should earn $138,000 a year.
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Obama Myspace
Tim and Brian talk to the dude who made a myspace for Barack Obama
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Hollaback Tim
Timmy talks about taking his wife out to a Gwen Steffani concert, and leaving to scallop some tickets.
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Pablo The Mexcican Guy?
a "mexican" guy, Pablo calls in from the frontlines of the Illegal immigration protest, but he could be a phony...
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Jim Gott Man!
Dodger great, Jim Gott drops by and chats it up with Tim and Sammy Phillips
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The 24 Year Old Virgin
Tim and Brian try to hook up a chick who has never banged a dude to this audience of degenerates.
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Woolsey And Her Loogie
Woolsey got spat on by Johnny Vegas, and now the 8 month relationship from hell could possibly be over.
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Yellin At That Kid Man
In light of the Alec Baldwin incident, Tim, Brian and Sammy Phillips reflect on how they have treated baby Sophia on the phone
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What Do The Homeless Listen To
Tim and Brian wonder what radio the homeless listen to. is it the No stress express on The Wave? Is It Oldies? or is it FM Talk?
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Again With These Effing Mugs!
Whitman has gone off the deep end with these mugs. He's actually writing letters to people at the station asking them for mugs. If you have a mug, send it to Whitman, and we'll fill his house with these mugs!
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Be A Man! Its Tax Day!
Tim and Brian want to know how much you are in the hole with the government, so Tim can feel better about paying thousands of dollars in Gambling winnings
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Pet Funerals
Whitman wants to be buried with his pets.....oh babu...
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The Imus Rewind
Alright gang, This is the end of all the Imus stuff. We end it here with a rewind of all the events of last weeks Imus-A-Thon.
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The Imus Coverage Is Almost Over
Tim recorded a bunch of clips over the weekend of Imus coverage including a terrible SNL impression...Those guys gotta hire Whitman...
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Imus Gives A Young Leykis A Tour
Back in the early 70's a young Tom Leykis went to take a tour of 66 WNBC with Don Imus, and Tim and Brian have uncovered the tape of that event.
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Teen Mommy
Tim and Brian talk to a 14 year old girl who is having a baby and doesn't know who the father is...I wonder if she and her baby will have the same curfew.
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Imus Made The LA Times!
The LA times has reported about Don Imus calling into The Conway And Whitman Show to defend his case, and now Imus wants to apologize to you for anything.
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Imus Gets The Double Axe
Now That Imus has been fired from MSNBC and CBS Radio, he joins Tim and Brian in studio to apologize for apologizing
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Locking Up The Cigs And Booze? No Way!
Tim and Brian are outraged that politically correct nutjobs want parents to lock up the cigarettes and alcohol at all tmes to protect the kids. Jesus Christ!
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The Radio Stars Come Out
Tim and Brian talk to the likes of Tom Leykis, Rick Dees, Al Rantel, Sean Hannity, and Casey Casem to get their reaction to the Imus controversy.
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Imus Gets The Boot
Don Imus calls in once again to discuss his being fired from MSNBC with Tim and Brian.
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More Imus, Man
It looks like they're getting ready to crucify this Donnie Imus, Man
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Casino Monday
Its Time for scratch-off Mondays! You call in and a celebrity guest will scratch your ticket!
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More With Imus
Don Imus comes back to talk to Tim and Brian about the apology he made for his comments.
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Donnie Imus Man!
Don Imus gets on the phone with Timmy to defend himself against some racy comments he made.
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Woolsey Is Done For
There's no helping this chick anymore. Johnny Vegas is slashing her tires now and she still stays....oh babu...
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Adopt A Woolsey
Woolsey needs some parents man, then maybe she'll get the self-esteem to dump Johnny Vegas
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Low End Gamblers
Gerry Wachovsky wins the Trifecta at the track, but only gets 17 bucks because he only bet A dollar. Timmy wonders why the eff he even goes!
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Todd Black Man!
Tim and Brian talk to a really big hollywood stud, Todd Black
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Oh Woolys...Oh Babu
Shanna Woolsey has now been tackled to the ground by her boyfriend, and freaked her out on a drunken tirade, but the marriage and kid plans are still on. Is there anyone out there who can get through to this chick?
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Casino Monday
Its scratch off Mondays dude! you could win a whopping 2 bucks!
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Big Effing Ratings Dude!
Tim and Brian's ratings have doubled in the last month, and now they wanna know what bits you love and what bits piss you off.
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Fire In That Hotbox
Tim and Brian recap the massive fire that blazed the Toluca Lake/Universal Area Today
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Arsenio Effing Hall!
Bad News - Whitman's Out. Good News - Arsenio Hall is joining Tim for the night. And this hour Tim wants to know whats with all these stars buying huge mansions.
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Effin Supermarket Strikers
Tim thinks that unskilled laborers don't deserve to have a union, and Brian throws out some of his Socialist ideals.
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Woolsey Is Really Effin Stupid
God love the girl, but she just can't get herself to shake off the idiot boyfriend known as Johnny Vegas that we've all come to know and hate.
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Dennis Miller
Tim wonders what the appeal of Dennis Miller's new radio show is, and Brian can't believe another comedian is about to make his medium look bad.
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Using That Internet At Work
Brian catches Tim on expressbet.com minutes for the show and wonders what crap on the internet people are looking at while at work.
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Effin Airplanes
Tim and Brian talk about the new 14,000 passenger jet from Airbus.
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Casino Monday
Its Scratch-Off Mondays! and this time Tim and Gerry have a practical joke to play on Brian!
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Mixing Vices
What's the best combination of sex, drugs and booze that you've come up with?
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Stripper Millionare, Sam And Norm
Tim and Brian play "Who Wants To Be A Millionare" with the Spearmint Rhino girls, and then Sam Simon and Norm MacDonald Drop in to bitch about gambling.
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Jerri Manthey And The Leykis Off
Tim and Brian talk to Jerri Manthey from Survivor, and then get the audience to decide who does a better Leykis Impersonation - Brian Whitman, or Billy West.
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Jennifer Blanc
Actress/Comedianne, Jennifer Blanc talks to Tim and Brian about the upcoming Wizard convention.
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Psychic Wednesday
Hello Sweet Spirits! straight from Hollywood, Califlorida, Its Kenny Kingston!!!
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Jamie Gold
Tim and Brian talk to the World Poker Champion, Jamie Gold.
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Pete Rose
Tim and Brian debate on whether baseball great, Pete Rose, should be allowed to come back to the game
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Gerry The Singer
Gerry Wachovsky is trying to launch a novelty singing act. oh boy is it bad.
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Hearin Those Voices
Alright dude, do you hear voices in the backround that shouldn't be there? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Casino Monday
Its Scratcher Time Everybody! Call in and we'll play a scratcher for ya.
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Leykis On Jeni
Tim And Brian Get Tom Leykis On The Line To Talk About The Suicide Of Comedian Richard Jeni
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Effin Bumper Stickers
Tim and Brian wonder who the eff you're trying to impress when you put a stupid bumper sticker on your car with your effin opinions.
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Totally Open Effing Phones Man!
Thats Right, its time to talk about anything and everything, and its the one time a week where you get to listen to coked-up Tim!
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Effin Booing
Jesus Christ! Now you can't boo at a high school sports game? What the eff is wrong with these people?
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Make Leykis And Conway Laugh (3.9)
If you can make Timmy Conway Jr. and Tommy Leykis laugh, then you're gonna get yourself a decent prize! But you'll probably just have some lame joke that everyone's heard a billion times. Jesus Christ!
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Winnin That Effin Lotto
If you won 80 mil, what would you do with it? I tell ya man, Timmy cound spend the rest of his life at Santa Anita with that kinda dough.
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Poppin That Cherry Man!
Tim and Brian want to know if chicks hold a special place in their heart for the dude the popped their cherry with
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Fat Tuesday
When did you realize you were an effing pig?
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Those Image Awards
Tim and Brian recap more of the wackiest speeches ever from the NAACP Image Awards
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The Lotto
Tim and Brian talk about the major California Lottery jackpot
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Casino Monday
All right Dudes, you call in and we'll play a scratch off for you. If you win, we'll send you the cash!
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Presidential Pandering
Tim and Brian talk about all the presidential hopefuls sinking really low to get your attention
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That Effin Anna Nicole
Tim thinks that every sorry excuse for a human being that went to Anna Nicole Smith's funeral should jump in a hole and never come back. Eff Em All!!!
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Let Me Borrow That Top
Let Me Borrow That Top, Let Me Borrow That Top! Aren't We Friends? Let Me Borrow That Top!
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Will Power
The more willpower you have, the longer you'll live, but you'll also be bored out of your effin mind at 100.
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The Effing Bus
Tim rode the city bus today, and it was depression city.
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800 Effing Dollars!
Seriously! Timmy lost over 800 dollars in one effing day with 2 and 5 dollar bets!
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I'm Paul Magers
CBS2 News anchor, Paul Magers talks to Tim and Brian about the world.
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Totally Open Phones
All right gang, anything you wanna say? Anything you wanna talk about? We'll put you on
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Billy Ray
Tim's old buddy and director of "Breach", Billy Ray drops in
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Woolsey Needs A Job
Lets face It, you don't choose to live on Sherman Way and Lankershiem, you are there because you're broke. And thats where our very own Shanna Woolsey is residing with Johnny Wackjob. So If you have a job for her so she can make some extra cash so she can
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Anna Effing Nicole
Now that the judgment is over on her body, are we done with this effing story?
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Psychic Wednesday
Hello Sweet Spirits! I want you all to hold hands and wear red. Its time to welcome Kenny Kingston to the studio all the way from Hollywood California!
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Rehab
Why is it that all of Timmy's vices, (Gambling, Booze, Smoking) all have a phone number attached to them?
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Woolsey's Wild Weekend
Shanna Woolsey has broken up and made up with her boyfriend this weekend more times than you could ever imagine.
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Vegas Baby!
Brian recaps his weekend in Vegas, and this time he only lost $3900!
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Make Leykis And Conway Laugh
If you've got a decent joke, then we've got a decent prize for you. All ya gotta do is make Conway and Tom Leykis Laugh!
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Psychic Wednesday
Hello Sweet Spirits! Kenny Kingston is here to give you psychic advice, whether it's wealth, career, or romance advice. The answers are out there!
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Gay In The NBA
Tim and Brian discuss how much money you could make being the only "out" player in the NBA
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Dr. Drew At The Grammys
Tim and Brian are LIVE at the Grammys, and this segment they're talking to Loveline's Dr. Drew Pinsky
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Albert Hammond Jr At The Grammys
Tim and Brian are LIVE at the Grammys, and this segment they're talking to The Strokes' Albert Hammond Jr., and Brian gets pissed at him.
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Craig Gass at the Grammys
Tim and Brian are LIVE at the Grammys, and this segment they're talking to impressionist, Craig Gass
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Kenny Kingston And Mike Boguslawski
Hello sweet spirits! If you need consumer advice, you can talk to Mike Boguslawski, if you need psychic advice, you can talk to Kenny Kingston, and if you need free advice, you can call Jack and Jeff at 11.
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A Special What The Hell Did Jesse Jackson Say?
All right gang, we do this each and every Thursday, but since we'll be at the Grammys tomorrow, we're doing it today! Its time for "what the hell is this Jesse Jackson saying?" Yess! 5-2-0 97-1 Woah!
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Gerry The Ex-Executive Producer
Brian has stripped the title of Executive Producer from our little sausage fingers Wachovsky after he forgot to get the ball rolling on the mile run remote.
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SuperBowl Commercials
All right gang, do you remember the product the commerical was selling, or just the commerical itself? Let's see how well these spots affected you.
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NewHopeVille Iowa
Tim and Brian are joined by Tim's dad, and the heads of a town in Iowa that apparently know of a couple of guys who stole Tim Conway and Harvey Korman's act.
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Tim Effing Conway!
Tim's Dad, THE Tim Conway tells us stories of the Conways at the track.
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Totally Open Phones
All right gang, we do this each and every Friday, anything you wanna say, we'll put ya on.
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Chariots Of Pizza
Brian thinks he can run a mile in under 10 minutes. And Tim is setting up all the exotic bets possible to humiliate him.
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This Effing Traffic!!!
Tim and Brian bitch about the 405 getting shut down and screwing everyone up in the valley.
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David Goldstein
David Goldstein from CBS2 drops by to talk to Tim and Brian about restaurant fish scams.
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Randy Effing Wang Man!
Tim and Brian bring me, Randy Wang into the studio to negotiate a price for the new Conway and Whitman website I built for them.
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Tim Lost His Wallet
Hey dudes, if you went to a Ralphs in the valley last night and you took Tim's wallet, please give it back.
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Conspirasy Theories
Tim and Brian talk to all the wackos in LA that think Bush caused 9/11 or that the Clintons killed Kennedy.
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Brian The Actor
Brian gets furious when Tim and Gerry uncover a tape of Brian's acting debut.
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Idiot Pedestrians
If you're dumb enough to cross the street without looking both ways, you deserve to get hit by a truck!
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Tim's Quest For Italian Food
Tim is looking for an Italian place with the best meat sauce in LA. Luckily his partner, Brian Whitman has eaten more Italian food than anyone else in LA!
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Engineering
Brian yells at Gerry for listening in on their off air conversations, but Gerry explains he had to do so because of a problem with the board, so Tim and Brian bring in Engineer Ron to save the day.
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Dakota Fanning
Tim is outraged at the 12 year old actress, Dakota Fanning, for doing a rape scene in a movie.
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Brian's Life Alert
Tim convinces Brian to get a life alert button for when he has that massive heart attack.
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Sylvia Brown Should Go To Hell Part 1
Tim, Brian and Kenny Kingston are outraged at this so-called psychic, Sylvia Brown who told the parents of a kidnapped child that he was dead, and then somehow the kid turned up not dead.
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Tim Is Irritated
Tim thinks that Brian, Gerry and Shanna only come in to irritate the hell out of him.
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Jennifer Strange's Lawyer
The attorney representing the woman who died holding her wee for a Wii talks to Tim and Brian about the case.
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This Effing Traffic
Tim and Brian give the traffic report that you really need. A traffic report that bitches about CalTrans and their stupidity and laziness.
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Bonus Jesse And The Lottery
Tim and Brian do a bonus round of Jesse and then Tim talks about the things he would do if he won 100 Million bucks.
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The Sopranos Edited
Tim and Brian premiere what the A&E version of The Sopranos sounds like...and it's bad
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That Icebox
Hey Al Gore, if global warming really exists, then why is it so freaking cold in the valley??
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What Stupid Crap Have You Done?
In light of the "Hold your wee for a wii contest" turned bad, Tim and Brian want to know some of the retarded crap you've done.
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Why Won't You Date Brian Whitman
In an effort to get Brian out of teri cloth shorts and into the social world, Tim asks hot chicks to call in and say why they wouldn't date Brian Whitman.
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Sam's Pissed And Starbucks Orders
Sam Phillips calls in to talk to Tim about not using her as the fill-in host this week, and then Tim and Brian compare their wacky coffee orders.
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Threesomes Gone Bad
Tim and Gretchen Massey explore the world of threesomes gone horribly wrong
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Joe Esposito
Tim and Gretchen Massey talk to Elvis' former road manager, Joe Esposito.
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That LA Traffic
Whitman got a shot of cortisone in his neck, so he's out again, but Gretchen Massey is here with Tim to bitch about traffic in LA.
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Naked Parties
All right gang, would you go to an all nude party? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Terms Of Endearment With Gretchen Massey
Whitman's out once again, but Gretchen Massey is here to pick up the slack, and she doesn't care when Tim calls her dear, darling, sweetpea, or any other phrase from the 50's.
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Seperate Beds
All right Gang, Do you sleep in a different bed than your wife? 5-2-0 97-10!
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Brian's A Fannilow
Brian David Whitman admits that he has gone to no less than three Barry Mannilow concerts.
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New Crazy Laws For 2007
I said it man. every freakin year these yutzes in government come up with the stupidest laws! ahhh baboo.
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Alcohol Detecting Cars
Jeesus Christ, who the F wants a car that won't let you turn the engine over if you've had a freakin beer?
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Excuses To Get Out Of Work
He went home to use the toilet, He called in sick because of his ear. he called in sick because the truck that delivers meat to his house crashed, but finally Brian David Whitman is out of ideas on excuses to not be here. Do you have any? 5-2-0 97-1-0!
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Public Executions
Whitman's Back But Conway's Stuck At The Track, So Sammy Phillips is back as well. This hour, they're talking about public executions!
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Totally Open Phones
Tim Conway Jr. and Brian Whitman wrap up their final show in 2006...with no topic, But It is open phones, talk about Anything! 5-2-0-97-1-0! See Ya In 07!
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The Best Highs
Tim and Brian ask our highly stones audience which drug gives you the best high.
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Donald Trumps Rosie
Tim and Brian aren't sure whose side to take in this Donald Trump-Rosie O'Donnell feud. They're both so irritating...plus alot.
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Tim's Old Time California
Tim talks about how great California used to be back in the day. Now all these people moving in have ruined Southern California and especially the valley. You can't even go in the water without getting sick nowadays!
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Fat Tuesday
Allright Gang, when did you realize that you were a complete f'ing pig?
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Condoms For Inmates
Jesus Christ, they wanna give condoms to the prisoners so they can commit A-Rape safely. Baboo!
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How Much Is On Him? Live At Morongo Casino
Tim and Brian ask the callers to ask how much cash multi-millionaire Sam Simon has on him, and how much cash multi-dollaraire Malibu Dan has on him live at Morongo Casino.
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Stealing From The Office
A now hot dog filled satisfied Whitman and Sam Phillips talk to callers who steal from the office, and we're talking about things bigger than just pens and paper.
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Johnny Vegas, Hot Dogs, And A Hungry Whitman
Brian gave Johnny Vegas, Woolsey's dopey boyfriend, 60 dollars to go get some Pinks Hot Dogs (which is only a couple of blocks from the station), and it's been 2 hours already, and Brian Whitman WANTS HIS HOT DOGS!
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Sam Phillips Vs. Frosty, Heidi And Frank
Theres a bit of controversy in the FreeFm world. Frosty, Heidi and Frank took a couple of low blow stabs about Sam Phillips while she was doing charity work for the station. Now it's time to hear Sammy's rebuttal
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Totally Open Phones
Its totally open phones...more topics, better variety, and your phone calls. Just call 877-97....(aww crap, wrong show again).
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Christmas Cash Giveaway
Give us a good reason and we'll drop you with 20, count 'em 20 Christmas dollars. Imagine how your life could change with 20 extra bucks.
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Make Leykis And Conway Laugh
Allright gang, If you got a decent joke, we got a decent prize for ya, all you gotta do is make Tom Leykis and Tim Conway Jr. Laugh. BwahHAHAHAA! HEhehehehe! BwoHoooHoo!
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Exterminating White Dudes
In response to a wacko on CSPAN claiming that we should exterminate all white people, Tim and Brian wonder who actually takes these people seriously.
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Prison Break Dude
Tim and Brian talk to the audience about the Prison Break actor who was killed in a car crash on Beverly Blvd
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More Dramarama With Shanna Woolsey
Too bad she doesn't like Chris Carter, because Shanna Woolsey is really into the Dramarama of her relationship with Johnny V. everyday it's a bigger fight and a step towards these 2 getting hitched. Hold On...I'm gonna go bang my head against the wall.
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Getting High On Cough Medicine
Tim and Brian have their resident drug expert, Malibu Dan join them to discuss the wave of kids getting high on that Robatussin man.
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Its Just O-Mazing!!
The O-Mazing Ring has signed on for another year as a sponsor and now they have celebrity endorsements.
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Malibu Dan And Nate
Hey Buddies! Malibu Dan returns with his writing bud, Nate to showcase some Christmas tunes.
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Lance, Rip And Roses
Lance Bass Is Broken Up, Rip Torn is F-ed Up, And Guns n Roses Tickets are up for grabs.
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Companies Trying To Control What You Eat
I said it man. These companies trying to make a hamburger 5 bucks so you'll buy a salad for 2 bucks, what a load. Well, we could apply that here and charge Woolsey every time she talks about Johnny Vegas.
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Brian's Trip To The Strip Club
I tell ya man, this Whitman goes to a strip club and what does he think about afterwards? Not A stripper. This guy thinks about the chap stick he leaves in the chair. Baboo
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Whitman Wants To Use The N-Word
I said it man, that Whitman has lost it, after reading another Kramer story this guy wants to say the N-Word on the air. baboo
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Norm Is Scared Of Cars
Among the chatter at the La Auto show, Norm Mac Donald brings up to Tim and Brian how he is very afraid of cars.
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Sam Simon Doesn't Like Kramer
Among the chatter at the La Auto show, Sam Simon brings up to Tim and Brian how he used to work with Michael Richards and how he is a jackass.
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Britney Spears' Crotch
Jesus Christ, I tell ya man there's these photos of Britney Spears without any panties, and It sure doesn't look pretty man.
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Paul Magers and Tipping The Service
CBS2 News Anchor Paul Magers calls in to talk to Tim and Brian, and then Tim thinks about firing all his gardeners, maids and other hired help so he doesn't have to give them a Christmas tip. I tell ya man, thats a way to save some dough.
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Dogfood For FireFighters
Alright Gang, A Firefighter wants 2.7 million because he was the victim of a little prank where his buds put dogfood in his lunch. Jesus Chirst
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Woolsey Pulls The Big Screwsey
They're movin on up! To The East Side! To A Deluxe Apartment in The... Actually Woolsey is moving to the valley with Johnny V, and she's screwing over her current landlord in the process.
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Harry BelaJackass
Despite Brian's rave reviews, Tim refuses to see the movie "Bobby" simply because that jackass Harry Belafonte is in it.
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Open Phones Live At SkiDazzle
It's Wide Open Telephones, you can talk about anything we discussed this week, or anything you think we should have talked about. You can yell, scream, jump up and down, as long as you are absolutely...(Aw crap thats Leykis' line)
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Brian's Date Gone Bad
The persian chick who wanted to go on a date with Brian Whitman is here.....and she brought her boyfriend.
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The Most Influencial Music
Tim and Brian go over the list of the 100 most influencial albums ever made, and then sing the John Kerry song...again.
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Cuursing Out and Michael Rozbruch
Tim talks about how he uses more F's and S's than anyone (except for the 3 hours a night he's on radio) and Tax Resolution guy Michael Rozbruch comes in to chat.
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Open Phones
Its Totally Open Phones! More Topics, Better Variety, Plus Some Free Advice, Free Advice, Fr....Oh wait thats John & Jeff's Motto.
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Sexual Harassment
Woolsey is threating legal action after Tim apparently sexually harassed her when he asked what size top she was.
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Audio Text Messaging
Are you in your car texting away on the cellphone? How about you call Tim and Brian and send an audio text message?
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The Return Of Johnny Vegas
Out of her car and into the studio, Shanna Woolsey's boyfriend Johnny Vegas takes another beating from Tim and Brian.
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Jim Gaffigan
Comedian Jim Gaffigan calls in to talk to Tim and Brian.
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Dog Ambulances
Tim and Brian get into another heated discussion about dogs and...well, you pretty much know whats going to happen.
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Oprah and Whitman's Sex Moves
Tim and Brian wonder what is wrong with women who go to see an Oprah taping, and then Whitman tries to tell the audience of a sex move that he does that 9 out of 10 women hate.
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Podcasts, Open Phones, And an Adult Video Store
Tim and Brian Play a Podcast Montage. Then it's totally Open Phones - more topics, better variety (Oh wait thats John & Jeff's motto.) Plus, a bunch of celebrities go to an Adult Video store.
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More Woolsey Boyfriend Madness!
It's Time for the weekly update on how screwey Shanna Woolsey's relationship is now! Did Johnny V. Cry? Did he weep? Did he call all the guys on her cellphone? Tune in to Find Out!
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The Price is Right Auditions
Rick Dees, Come on Down! Tom Leykis, Come on Down! Its your turn to audition to be the new host of...... The Price is Right!
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More With Kenny Kingston
Hello sweet spirits, Kenny Kingston is back for more stories of Gretta Garbo and a bunch of other celebrities that died 50 years ago.
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Porno Pickup Lines and Kenny Kingston
Tim talks about a friend who can pick up chicks by asking them if he can try a sex move on them. Then sweet spirit, Kenny Kingston comes in to talk about his experience on the "Jack and Jeff" show, and his stories of Gretta Garbo
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Gay Parties and John Kerry
Tim and Brian ask the audience if straight dudes go to the parties on Santa Monica Blvd, and then bitch about the newest blunder from John Kerry
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IHOP, Borat and Yakov
Brian discusses his 4AM IHOP trip, then Tim and Brian draw the line from Borat's act to Yakov Shmirnoff's act.
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Haloween Sex
Tim and Brian take juicy calls about crazy Haloween sex
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No Dogs Allowed in the Workplace
We're not talking about Gerry Wachovsky, but actual dogs in the workplace. CBS Radio doesn't allow Dogs in the building, and Tim thinks its an outrage.
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Donald Trump
"Donald Trump" tries to defend himself after Tim calls him a "Crazy Celebrity"
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Johnny Vegas
Woolsey's boyfirend "Johnny Vegas" comes in studio to take a beating from Tim and Brian
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Crappy Political Ads
There are some really stupid and redundant political ads out there, and Tim and Brian will point them out to you
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Conway And Ripoff
Two schmucks from New Mexico are ripping off Tim and Brian's act... and they're doing it badly
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Nightmare on Woolsey Street
Woolsey's wacko boyfriend is moving to LA! Lock your doors, shut your windows, and turn the volume down when Woolsey screams.
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Is Weird Al Talented?
Tim thinks Weird Al isn't creative, despite his recent success. So, Is Weird Al Talented?
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The Booze That Makes You Sick
Typically the booze you drink and puke on when you're a kid, makes you sick as an adult, too. Plus, Scott Mason drops in to plug HD Radio.
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Weird Al
Tim and Brian discuss the recent resurgance in Weird Al Yankovic's career.
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Woolsey and Johnny V
After barley a month of dating, Johnny V wants to marry Shanna Woolsey. Why is she still with this nut?
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Old Farts
All these old farts are doing shows on stage -- and whooooooo CARES!
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Starbucks
Why arent there a whole lot of Starbucks in the South Bay?
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Crazy Dog Guys
Some nut is trying to name the dogs he breeds before he sells them to pet stores -- and Brian tries once again to blur the line between animal and human (while Tim insults him for doing so.)
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Quinceneras
Tim and his wife are going to a Quincenera. what should he expect?
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Old Dudes Cant Drive
George Weller, the guy who ran over a bunch of people at a Farmers market, still hasnt been found guilty
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Bickering Podcasters
Webmaster Ryan Wong talks to Tim and Brian about all the goings on at the station
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The Bloggers And The Homeless
Ryan and Angel, The 2 guys who blog the show on Myspace, come to the studio to hear about Brian's generosity, aong other things
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Dieting Couples
Tim and Brian take calls from guys who are on the same diet as their wives
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